the words less traveled

This evening I helped some friends who are renovating their newly bought house. As I left they were thanking me for helping while I was thanking them for letting me come and play with their new house. How sweet would it be to have the budget and time to just pick a house and fix it up? Add a wall here, take that wall down, paint over that hideous orange in the kitchen. I'm sure that such a project might loose some of its appeal if I was living in the midst of the chaos, but it was a lot of fun talking with him and what he was doing with the house, how are you going to frame that out, agreeing on how weird the house had been built by the original owner. Ahhh, bliss.
I've been thinking (never a good sign) during the several awkward silences I have been part of this week about how much never gets said. Think about it, how often do you think about saying something but stop short of actually verbalizing? Now I know that often times this is a good thing as I can sometimes think things that are not especially uplifting, but aside from that how often do I stop short of speaking because I am trying to play it cool or just loose my nerve? What would it even look like if I actually spoke what was on my heart completely without any second thoughts to appearances. People might think I was nuts, but they would surely recognize that something about me was different. What if I just told my friends exactly how good it was to see them, or gave the complete and blatant truth about my life, good or bad, when someone asked "how's it going?". How would people take it if I started telling the women around me just how beautiful they are? (ex. Hi, you don't really know me but I just wanted to say that you look amazing today) Shy of that I'd just like to be able to openly tell a girl that I'm interested in them without having to spend a week working myself up for it. What would that total honesty look like? I doubt the world is ready for such a man, and even more if I could ever get like that but it would be nice if just a few more of those stifled words were set free.
As always I'm looking forward to this weekend with hope. Weekends always bring hope, hope of getting the chance to enjoy friendships and fun. Too often I squander my weekends to the backs of my eyelids (sleep) or television. But the great bit is that every weekend brings new hope of some fun get together with friends. We shall see what this weekend brings.